So, you’ve got everything you need for tonight’s smoke session. Rolling papers? Check. Joint filters? Roger that. Grade A strain? Absolutely. Pizza burgers for when the munchies hit? Oh yes. But then you realise you’re missing one vital piece of the puzzle: a grinder. You scour through your stash box for a good ten minutes… Nada. No grinder to be found.
Here’s the good news. The absence of a grinder doesn’t mean the end of the world. There are many ways to get that perfect grind for your herb, even without the trusty apparatus. If that’s piqued your curiosity enough, this article should provide you with the answers you may be looking for. Here's how to grind your weed without a grinder!
If you’re looking for the instant solution to your grinder woes, look no further than your own two hands. Those little digits called fingers do a decent-enough job of breaking down your dank, aromatic herbs into smokable pieces.
This is by far the simplest way to grind your weed, but extra-sticky strains could pose a challenge. Should you run into this little problem, just leave it out to dry a bit. If that still doesn’t work, a few minutes in the freezer could help. And, just like how you’d handle food, wash your hands before diving in. No one wants to smoke weed held by filthy hands.
Then there’s the coffee mill, otherwise known as a coffee grinder. Coincidence? Definitely not. Yes, this mini appliance that you use to pulverise your coffee beans is also effective for your weed.
Here are some pro tips: first off, clean your coffee mill before grinding away. Unless you want to infuse some coffee flavour into your buds, don’t forget about this first step. Second, avoid overpacking and overwhelming your coffee grinder. What’s great about the coffee mill for weed grinding is that this nifty device works well with larger nugs. Talk about efficiency.
The pestle and mortar have been part of human existence since 35000 BCE. This dynamic duo of the kitchen is great for crushing peanuts, dehusking rice, and, in this case, grinding your high-quality herbs.
There’s an obvious similarity with the pestle and mortar and using your hands. Both involve manual labour, which means that the dampness or dryness of your buds will influence how hard you have to work. Too much of the former will make it more challenging to deal with, so be sure to dry them a bit first. As is customary with any kitchen appliance, don’t forget to wash your pestle and mortar after use to avoid contamination.
Time to channel your inner Master Chef. If you have decent-enough knife skills to not cut yourself, this could be an effective method for you. As you would when chopping meat, veggies, and culinary herbs, make sure your board is clean and dry. Drying out your buds isn’t necessary for this one, but you can choose to do so for easier chopping. Now, unlike an apple or an onion bulb, weed nugs are usually a lot smaller. Be extra careful, especially if you’re using a sharp knife. Lastly, chop your weed into medium-sized particles. You don’t want to render your nugs into a powder.
Who says graters are only good for cheese and potatoes? In the absence of a grinder, this handy kitchen tool is a reliable substitute. Again, this requires some extra labour on your part, so be prepared for a bit of an arm exercise. And, if you’re a novice at using a grater, go slowly. You wouldn’t want bits of your skin to be infused into your buds, now would you? The clean-up could also be a chore since bits of the buds can get stuck in the grater’s crevices. In this case, a poking device like a toothpick should work fine.
Here’s something to make your weed grinding a bit more fun. Take an empty pill bottle, film container, or any small container you can close off. Throw your nugs in there, along with a coin. Screw on the cap or lid and start shaking away. You can add some background music and move to the beat if you want to, but be sure not to overdo it and end up pulverising your stash. Another word of advice: sanitise your coin before dropping it in. A good wipe-down with some rubbing alcohol or hand sanitiser should do the trick.
Any house will have a pair of scissors and at least one shot glass stowed away. Now, you might not see the value in these two things together. But, add weed to the party, and you get to have some fun. Put a bud inside the shot glass, and use the scissors to cut it up. The glass will act as the basin for the smokable bits. You can always add a piece of paper underneath to catch any particles that fall out. If a shot glass is too small for you, feel free to use an old-fashioned glass.
This might seem like overkill to some. But, as the adage goes, “If you’re walking on ice, you might as well dance”. In this case, if you don’t have a weed grinder, go with a blender. This method works best if you’re grinding ounces at a time. If you’re hosting a smoking party for a large group, a blender will be your best friend for the night. There is one caveat, though: you may end up turning your buds into a fine powder. To prevent that from happening, go with the pulse setting on your blender. Turn it on in short intervals until you achieve your preferred grind quality.
Here’s another uncomplicated way to grind your weed. All you need is a Ziploc bag and some top-notch crumpling skills. Here’s what you’ll do: take a handful of buds, place them in the bag, and start crumpling away. Take yourself back to elementary school when you’d discard an essay draft you weren't happy with. This is the ideal method for those who don’t want to get their fingers coated with the weed’s sticky residue. If you want to add an extra thump to the grinding process, you can use the end of a kitchen utensil of your choice.
Parchment paper is commonly used to prevent food from sticking to a pan. You can also use it to grind your weed and avoid any stickiness. Step one would be to cut up a few pieces of paper. Place them between your fingers and proceed with method number one as stated above. But, if you don’t want to make your hands do all the work, you can use the paper as a barrier and mash the weed with a utensil of your choice.
So, maybe you don’t have some parchment paper lying around the house, but you’ll definitely have a set of keys and some cards in your pocket. Both of these everyday objects can be turned into handy tools for weed grinding. The key has its serrated edges to get the job done, while the cards are firm enough to break those buds down. Just be sure to sanitise these objects before using them.
You can press your luck by literally pressing your buds against a colander or fine sieve of some sort. Be aware that this method is likely to leave particles behind on your utensil, and it may be more effort than it's worth. Cleaning could be unpleasant, too. Still, if you'd like to go this route, just place a bowl underneath your sieve to catch the ground weed, and get to pressing! This method is obviously much safer for your fingers than the cheese grater, but don't expect the same quality of results.
Last but not least, the good old pizza cutter. Just like a knife, these rolling blades are sharp enough to mince your greens and turn them into smokable herbs. But, what’s great about the pizza cutter is that the rolling action makes it easier to deal with sticky buds. That’s something you might struggle with when using a knife. For those who find it awkward to use a pizza cutter for their pizza, use your buds for practice. You’ll get the hang of it eventually.
Grinders are a vital part of the cannabis stash box. They break your buds down to the perfect size, providing a slow, even burn for your joints. They also speed up the smoking process while keeping your buds' trichomes intact (and your hands from sticking to everything). But, in the unfortunate event you don't have a grinder around, there are several ways to break down your weed using everyday objects, or even your own body! Hopefully, this list will prove useful in the long run.